Thoughts

Hi there! It’s been the longest time since I wrote.. I know, and it doesn’t make me feel good!
But here I am, after all this while, randomly penning typing my thoughts down 🙂

Well, for starters, it’s been a very hectic 3 months for me. The CA journey doesn’t end after passing the final exam. It begins after the result, I’d say!
The post-result period not only invoked celebrations, but also plenty of self-talk, analysis and career planning. Trust me, it’s one of the more difficult tasks in life. It takes a lot to be honest to oneself and a lot more to have the courage to actually do what one likes!
So here I am, finally free (at least for now :p) from all the what-do-I-do-with-my-life muddle, having slightly more perspective about how I want my life to be 🙂
So I have got myself a fairly decent job (bye bye broke days) and now the ‘adult-feeling’ is finally sinking in – bills, payments, investments and what not! Work does keep me very busy most of the time, and hence, the no writing bit. But that is going to change for good 🙂

What urged me to write today, was a random chain of thoughts about how we take everything for granted and choose to be unhappy!
It all started with this status message that a friend posted on Facebook:
“I can’t believe that the last time we had Maggi was the LAST time we had Maggi!”
As absurd as it may sound, it actually got me thinking! Don’t we do this every time? Yes, I laughed..but this was some serious stuff! Do you know if the last time YOU met someone was actually the LAST time you met them? Or if the last time you went to some place was your LAST there? Or whether the last time you did something was indeed the LAST time you did that?? Sounds freaky.
It made me realise how I take so many things for granted! I take my family, friends and all my comforts for granted!
I crib about my job and work hours..but there are so many people out there who are waiting to get a job, but can’t find one! I do argue with my folks and get angry with them over the smallest thing. But then, how lucky am I to have such a beautiful family! To have people I can go back to, at the end of the day..to have people who’ll always have my back..to have people who love me unconditionally, and to whom I must choose to return this love 🙂
It got me thinking..that maybe when Steve Jobs said that we must live each day as if it’s our last, he didn’t really mean that we should be irrational. But rather, that we appreciate everything that we have and be grateful for all of it! To love everyone and treat everyone well..for we never know if it is indeed our LAST time with them. Maybe when we regret, it’s not really about things that we did not do. I guess it’s more about all the things that we have done, without knowing that it was our LAST chance and that we can do nothing to change it ever again!

Phew! That was some heavy thinking. But I feel happy at the end of it – I wrote!
I don’t know if I expressed myself well enough, but I tried!

This much for now.. But until next time, (choose to) be happy! 🙂

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Sleep!

sleep

 

Every day, hour after hour
you travel, you pray, you eat, you talk, you study, you work.
But sometime, take the time
and sleep…because
that is when you meet yourself
you meet the real you..
No false promises, no fake smiles, no pretense
no worries about how you’re dressed
or if your shoes match.
sleep…because
that is the window to your soul
and you know
who you are and what you want.

 

And I think you should sleep…because
that is when your thoughts come alive
your thoughts and feelings, yes the very ones that you had buried
deep, deep inside the darkest corner of your heart.
Sleep…because
suddenly, your life has meaning
you are in your truest form
unconscious, but yet so full of awareness
and your body,
it thanks you for the love and the peace.

 

Sleep…because
that is when you dream from your heart
you dream every dream
no you don’t analyse how it is
big or small, meaningful or meaningless, happy or not
you just dream
because every dream is in its purest form
Sleep…because
it gives you the courage you always lacked
and you dream
and you hope for your dreams to come true
if not all, then at least one.

 

Sleep…because
it stops your head from racing
temporary, but it is rare
it gives you the solace you sometimes crave
Sleep…because
it teaches you
that after every night,
there will always be another day.
Live  in the present, 
for just like your dreams,
the past, no matter how good or bad,
you will always forget.

…and he ran away

He ran as fast he could
So fast, that he’d begin to fly anytime.
The swiftness of his movement convinced me
that there would be no looking back.

He ran, as if to prove me wrong
I had taken him for granted long enough
He ran, to show me that he could
I hadn’t bothered about him all this while.

As he ran, I felt uneasy
Was he really going away?
What would I do now..
There was so much to do..so much to say.

I remembered how everyone said I was being naive
I thought..I thought, he’d stay
I felt like crying, but that was all I could do now
For he was long gone.

He had given me chance after chance
to mend my ways
Night and day had passed
and he had warned me that he would soon run away.

I looked at him eagerly
Expecting him to wait
I gazed ahead hopefully
Waiting for him to turn and return.

I felt guilty for not respecting him
while he was there
I felt alone..
Now I had to pave a new way. 

Had I listened to him a little more
Would he have stayed today?
Had I done what I should have
I might have not had to face this day.

I could only see the road that I had left behind
He ran to blur the road ahead
He had promised that I would be sorry
And then he ran way.

As I stand on the threshold of  a new life that awaits me outside college, I cannot help but feel emotional. To be honest, the feeling of college having ended hadn’t yet sunk into me until toady.
Gripped with nostalgia, I cannot help but look at the five years that passed so quickly. The memories will remain etched in my heart forever.
I feel a sense of nothingness. I feel guilty. I feel bad.
There were times when I’d happily declare how many lectures I had bunked in a day. But now I realize, that I won’t have lectures to attend at all..on any day! It suddenly strikes me, that nobody will give me a free lecture..ever again. Proxies, attendance, canteen and punishments will only be a thing of the past.
I wonder why I didn’t do all the things that I should have. I wonder why I didn’t realize that I’d regret that last day.
But Time had seen this coming. Time reminded me day by day. Time had given me chance after chance.
But eventually, even as I stood waiting for him, Time did run away.

Smile, have a good day!

So, when was the last time you thoroughly enjoyed yourself, or laughed, or smiled?
Does our daily schedule leave us with no time to feel good about ourselves? Is our life so hectic, that we don’t even remember what it is to smile?
Come on..nudge yourself! When was the last time you smiled?

Do you smile a cheeky smile when you realize that you’ve overslept, and will now have to run out of home or walk that extra mile?

When have you read the newspaper..and smiled because you realized that there was nothing worth the read?

Do you try to smell the morning breeze..the dew, the trees, the leaves and sun..and hug nature with a smile?

How many times have you tripped on that stone that you promised you wouldn’t oversee, but still smiled to yourself because it tricked you once again?

Of late, have you looked into the mirror and smiled, because you thought you looked great?

Have you missed a bus or a train and still smiled to yourself, just because you let all the bad luck drain?

You pass your school and college. Do those memories come flashing by and make you smile? 

The street kid at the signal you always pass..maybe he’s waiting for you to high five him someday..and wave off with a smile!

When the little boy down the lane wishes you a good morning, do you greet him back with a smile?

A nice memory come flooding into your head in the train. Did you smile to yourself without any apprehension of how (silly) others may think you are?

As juvenile as it may sound..when your crush passes by, do you do as little as, blush with a smile? 😉

Or did you indulge yourself at the coffee shop with your favourite drink and some yummy cookies..and did you smile after spending with yourself, some quality time?

Have you fought with your family or a friend, and yet had the courage to walk up to them, apologize and make up with a smile?

Or have you had to overtime..but still smiled to yourself..just because you had nothing better to do?

You meet your favourite people and aimlessly pass some of your precious time. Do you *still* smile and appreciate yourself for letting out that inner child?

The mother has cooked the food of your choice at home, after a long and tiring day at work. Do you feel happy and thank her with a smile?

How many times have you smiled innocently to your strict teacher or the grumpy boss and made him feel awful for being mean to you? 😛

Every day, every moment..we have so many opportunities to smile!
Maybe, the world won’t be that boring a place if all just got up and smiled! So smile, and have a good day 😉

Photo credits: http://www.mixedplateblog.com and random google finds.

Life and Death

The tired eyes looked around
Hatred and darkness was all they found
To be alive again, was his only cry
Was it that difficult a task for God, he’d always sigh

“You can stay here or get back your life;
But be wise, for your decision can end in strife
The world is here for you to see with your eyes
Be careful, for what you see may be less of truth and more of lies”

The tiny eyes looked around expectantly with a spark
Had the world lost its light? Or was it really so dark?
What made the man kill another man?
Had they forgotten each other while each for his ambition ran?

Crumbling was the relationship between mother and child
Here was a world where nobody was nice and no one kind
All he could see was battle scars
Everything was mine, nothing was ours

The weary eyes still looked about
In case a deed of goodness, they could manage to spot
A choice they had to make on that night
But all they could see, was dejection and fright

There was an option, there was a choice
But deep down inside, he heard that one voice
“Do not pity the dead, pity the living”, was all He said
“Do you wish to live a life that you already dread?”

This is a poem I wrote for The Rotaract Club Of NM College (RCNM’s) October bulletin – And So They Said..
The theme of the poem is based on the quote – “Do not pity the dead, pity the living”, from Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.
I hope you liked it!

Photo credits : http://www.mallady.wordpress.com

The mask.

 

He wears a mask everyday
The mask has now become a part of his face

Meticulously, he plans which one will fit in when and where
The mask is his sole respite and yet, his only friend

The mask knows whether to be happy and when to be sad
It knows just when to be good and when to lay a trap

The mask conceals his feelings and covers his flaws
Doesn’t it make him look perfect? More than he can ever be?

He says that his mask is only for others, only a comrade
What he cannot see is that the mask has made him forget himself.

Woh choti choti baatein…

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